We Support Anti Bullying - Kids should be kids.

We are Big Big supporters of Anti Bullying Campaigns and open discussion at Linkies Contest Linkies.

As one who was quite severely bullied as a young child right up to my late teen years I truly have lived the life of the bullied one.  I am always there to help others for support, to talk, share experiences and spread the word about this unnecessary evil lurking just outside everyone's door.

Bully's don't seem to have any boundaries and at times will stop short of nothing to get their point across and cause grief and terrorism to extremes.  Bullying can be subtle and on the flip side can be absolutely painful and brutal causing both mental and physical scars that can take a lifetime of soul searching and healing to recover from.

Its one thing as adults to deal with bullying and communicating between consenting adults BUT its quite another when our young ones leave the nest and head out into the world without the loving arms at home who have kept them safe since they began their life's journey.

Heading off to School for anyone's little ones can be extremely tough on their undeveloped fragile psyche, and quite literally stunt ones growth.    Who but themselves do they have to ensure they are kept safe and out of harms way when those alone moments hit.  Yes they have the teacher's inside the classroom, but who if there are no teachers during lunch break, recess, the walk to and from school or even taking a bathroom break do they have to ensure every moment is free from harm.  Nobody again but themselves. Relying on their own skills and what they learn at home behind closed doors can come in handy and be a real life saver to fall back on in

Communication and knowing what and how they are doing is key to taking pre-emptive measures.  You need to be on guard and learn good communication skills and be able to read between the lines and pay attention to bullying red flags.

Some of the Red Flags you should pay attention too :

1. Not wanting to go to school 
2. Mysterious stomach aches or headaches or faking sick
3. Not doing well in class
4. Avoiding the bus or going the long way or taking short cuts to avoid places and people
5. Bullying others at home or being an easy target for another sibling
6. General lack of confidence, walking with head down and slumping
7. Crying and listening to sad music

My own red flags that my parents missed some the same as above

• I absolute did everything I could to not go to school
• I was always acting sick and and pretending I had the flu
• I was average in class but not great by any means, middle of the road marks
• I absolutely avoided the bus on quite a few occasions and would lag behind so that I was late and could avoid my classmates on the way to school or go very early
• Total lack of confidence
• staying in my room at home becoming a hermit
• eating excess food, likely a way to hide from my feelings back then
• never had very many friends.
• I listened to very sad depressing music when I was quite young and cried often alone in my room. 

What you can do to ensure confidence from my point of view and help them to deal with the outside world before that day arrives.

• Talk and be sure you understand what your child is saying and be accepting of what they say and problems they face.  Having an open dialogue where your child trusts you is of the utmost importance going forward in life.  You are the one they can lean on when those times arise.
• Allow your children to have some friend bonding time at home, on weekends and allow supervised sleepovers.  ( My parents never allowed this and never allowed me to stay anywhere else) I learned no social skills and never learned from the get go how to communicate with others outside the home.
• Allow them to read books on the topic of bullying that is age appropriate for their level.
• Talk and discuss things with their teachers and perhaps parents of other children.  Building friendships with adults that are in the picture outside the home may have an effect on their own children, knowing there is communication between parents and teachers might lesson the chance the kids of those parents may bully your child.
• Talk to the bus drivers and get to know them, at this point in life they may know more than you about what's happening outside the home.
• Help your children to build friendships with other kids.  This is easy done by having a game night at home with some of the kids in their class.  While this is ongoing listen to their dialogue.  You may learn a thing or 2 and hear the stories of what has happened during your child's school day. They may open up to their peers and discuss things they may not with you.
• Find a bully in your child's circle of friends? Go first to the parents of that child, perhaps as much as you may not like it have that child come over as well for a game night or to watch a movie.  You can learn a lot about your enemies when you keep them close.  Understand this as well that some bully's also may need help, not all of them are of the understanding what their actions are doing.
• Seek advice from those who have dealt with bullying with their own children.
• Join a group, a forum online, google some resources
• Why not talk to the crossing guard and find out what might be happening in and around the school when nobody else is around.  Crossing guards can be a magnate of information.  
• Perhaps your own neighbours might know something you don't.  I lived in a town house complex growing up and bullying was quite bad in and around the complex.  
• How about the librarians, custodians in the school, supervisors on lunch duty and many others who may overhear and see what you are not.
• Get to know the ins and outs of your child's life outside the home without becoming a shadow.  You can do this by just being aware.  

These were just some of my tips to keep you informed from someone who dealt with bullying growing up Again you are the parent and the one who can really make a difference in your child's life.  Help them to help themselves.

I would like to make this an ongoing feature at Linkies Contest Linkies.  Yes my sight is a hub of activity mainly geared towards Contest,Sweepstakes and Giveaway's but I also have a responsibility as one who suffered a terribly sad upbringing to spread the word through my social media outlets.  This will not be a daily listing or topic and may only be once in a while but I will leave this as a post on the top of my page.

If you would like to submit your own story on bullying or share ideas and tips, please by all means add your own to this post or email me using my contact form on the top of my page and i will post your own story.  Perhaps you already have a post on bullying and you would like me to list your post and point it at your domain or just your link.  No worries I can do this too.  

Today I would like to say I am a happy well adjusted 39 yr old man and have healed many wounds from my past.  It is possible to heal scars and move beyond whatever ails you.

Thank you for reading my post if you would like I am all for sharing and getting the word out.  You can do this via Twitter, Linked in, Facebook, Google or post it anywhere you wish.

Sincerely

kevin from Linkies Contest LInkies